Monday, April 28, 2008

Stepping Out


Fighting.
Struggling.
Three years it went on.
A new one breathes freshly.
Do I leave the comfort?
I truly must.
I'm excited and blind.
It's going smoothly.
"I hope it works."

Sunday, April 27, 2008

New Works

Go on now. Take it from me. I’ve got my own now. Are you curious as to what it might be? Well I shall let that remain a mystery. This is turning around and I love the direction I face. The cool wind blows with me as if approving of the path. There used to be so much heaviness to each step I took. I was used to it. I didn’t notice it. But now as I walk with new motivation and life, I can tell how weakened it had made me. Yes, I am human. My thoughts still wonder on what could have been but it’s different than before. I don’t expect this to come about but I do still hope for it too. I have flaws and doubts even amidst this new found hope. I have them because it is new. I’m not sure about it just yet. I know greatness could come but with how much time? I am an impatient being. I’ve put so much into something else that did not come about and I don’t know if I want to leave what I have invested in and start on something new. I’m so not sure, even though this something new seems far more promising if only cause of its youngness. Oh how I roll around in moments and ignore some things I shouldn’t. I avoid the things I need to confront most. Its just a lot of things all at once.

Thursday, April 17, 2008

Instead

Oh come on. Why can't I find the push for this task which I must execute. I sit here typing away on nothing when this effort should be put toward something more, something that has more substance, something that will affect my future. But the conversations of early today have drained my mind and are distracting me more than normal. I don't want to say I'm back in something when there is so little to base it on. Days in the future can give this more life but they will be short and fleeting. My heart is beating and wanting for this. Then the looming shadow crosses my mind. I wish for this to be over and in a few short hours it could be... yet I sit here... still typing... still distracted. Does this distracting have something behind it or is it my mind just searching for something to grasp. I am at a time where what I want is taking over. I feel the need and I have the desire but I cannot find it. So much frustration. I want to yell it out. Two steps will bring me to the door and one more, inside. My feet are heavy though and the terrain is unfamiliar. My eyes don't see as they should... I don't know that they ever did. Five more minutes of this and I may be done and it may be too late. I've begun to connect to a different world. I've turned from where I am. Tonight is a peak moment of this. Tonight may change it all.

Saturday, April 12, 2008

Trip Up And Ate It

well well, good news all. im going to the 888 Toronto Meetup for YouTube. this is very exciting for me. ive always wanted to go to a YouTube gathering and now i totally get to!!! im gonna be meeting some people there that ive really wanted to meet. people like Shawna (nanalew), Todd (Toddly00), and one of my good buddies KingPolaris. this trip is gonna be expensive but its gonna be so much fun i dont even care at all. well thats about all the listings i have at the moment, i will type to you all some other time.... whoever you all are.

Wednesday, April 9, 2008

Left Handed, Right Sided

man oh geez.... first one to start off. to  be honest, i dont know how much ima gonna do on here. ill try this out every now and again. i used to do xanga but that kinda got old for me.... this might take a similar road, but we'll give this gun a shot for right now. well, ill say some things about myself: my name is Sam, im 20 yrs old (21 in May), i live in oklahoma, im in college at OU, im a psychology major, i do YouTube often, i aim often, i msn often, i stickam often, i skype some... well if there are any questions throw them up and ill catch what i can and sort them out for ya. catch ya lates!!!